Stage 4 of 6
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Stage four
One question, ninety days
90 days of follow-through
Each leader leaves with one interrupt to run before they react, and a check-in cadence so the new behavior survives past the workshop high.
One habit. One question. Ninety days. Not a framework, not a binder.
Before you react, you ask what you are trying to protect right now. Then you ask what you are teaching them to do next.
We set a cadence, a short check-in every two weeks, because the workshop high wears off around day eleven and the old loop is patient.
Run it: step by step
0 of 6 checked
1. Write the one-line commitment
15 min
- · Format: 'When ___ happens, instead of ___, I will ___.' One cue, one old move, one new move.
- · It has to be small enough to do on a bad day. 'Be more patient' is not a commitment. 'Count to five before I answer in standup' is.
- · Say it to one peer, who writes it down for you. That peer is your pair for ninety days.
2. Set the catch log
10 min
- · One line per catch: date, cue, what you did instead. Notebook or notes app, nothing fancier.
- · You log catches, not wins. A catch counts even if you did the old thing two seconds later.
- · Target is honest frequency, not a streak. Missing a day does not reset anything.
Say it like this
“Catching it is the skill. Doing the new thing is what catching it eventually buys you.”
3. Book the check-ins now
10 min
- · Six meetings, thirty minutes, every two weeks, on the calendar before anyone leaves the room.
- · Same pairs each time. Same three questions each time.
- · If someone misses two in a row, their pair calls them, not the facilitator.
4. Run the two-week check-in
30 min, every 2 weeks
- · Each person answers three questions: Where did you catch it? Where did you miss it? What is the next two weeks aimed at?
- · Bring one story where you did not pounce. Details, not summary.
- · End by re-reading your commitment out loud. If it has stopped fitting, rewrite it on the spot.
5. Day 45 gut check
45 min, whole group
- · Halfway point, whole room back together. Count catches, not outcomes.
- · Ask who has already quietly abandoned their commitment. Make it safe to say yes.
- · Rewrite any commitment that was too big. Half the room usually needs to.
6. Day 90 re-run
60 min
- · Everyone retakes the quiz. Compare to their stage-one result, not to each other.
- · Redraw the room's wall from stage two and put it next to the photo.
- · Finish the sentence again: 'Around here, when something gets hard, people learn to ___.' See if the sentence changed.
What you need in the room
- · Commitment cards, one per leader
- · A catch log: notebook or a shared notes template
- · Six recurring 30-minute pair check-ins on the calendar
- · The stage-two wall photo for the day-90 comparison
Debrief questions
- · Where did you catch it and still do the old thing anyway?
- · What cue is beating you the most?
- · Has your commitment gotten easier, or have you just stopped noticing the cue?
How this stage gets wrecked
The calendar wins
Nothing kills this stage like a busy quarter. The check-ins are thirty minutes and they are the whole intervention. If they get cancelled twice, the ninety days is over and the loop won. Protect them like customer meetings.
Before the next stage
Two weeks between every check-in, all the way to day 90. The gap is what makes it a habit instead of an event.
What each leader does
- · Run your interrupt question before you react. Every time you catch it.
- · Log the catches, not the wins. Catching it is the skill.
- · Show up to the two-week check-in with one story where you did not pounce.
How you know it landed
Leaders bring catches, not excuses, to the check-in.